What it's like.

So this is what it feels like
to love too much.
This is what it's like
to have your heart out on a platter
for him to discard.

To not be able to breathe
because whenever you think of him
the air around you turns into a thick fog.
And you think about him all the time.

This is what loving too much is like, then.
Wanting him close because that's the only time
that you're truly happy, the only time
that you don't have that constant feeling of waiting.

But at the same time wanting him far off,
because the longing to touch him, kiss him,
is far stronger when he's near.
And you know that you can't, that you're not allowed.

You want to know all about him, know
where he is, what he's doing, what's on his mind.
But you also want to cut him out of your life, for if
he can't be yours, you don't wanna know about his new girl.

So this is the agony of loving you, this is the joy of loving you.
So this is what it feels like,
for me, to love you too much.
Yet never enough, you deserve
all the love I have in me.
And you have it, take it, it's yours.