If I can't cut you out,
if you won't just go,
if my brain seems to only know the way to thoughts of you,
do I wish we never met?

Do I even dare think that?
Whenever I don't think of you,
for that split second?

And would it take away the pain,
and the feeling of emptiness, of having lost
everything,
if I never even knew
what life felt like without you,
without the void your existence leaves me with?

And do you wish that too?
Would you trade away all the pain I caused
for second thoughts the moment our eyes met?
Or even a severe headache,
making you stay in that night?
It would hurt less than I do. I promise.

Do you sometimes wish I didn't exist?
Or at least not to you?
And does that make you as sad as it makes me?